Even if…You Don’t

2017, I took Jana to see Mercy Me, her favorite band, for her birthday.

Will there ever be fun times again? Quite often, the answer seems to be a solid “no.” Of course, things will change, but that’s not always easy to remember or think about when life seems so dull and bleak. I am trying to inch my way back to even giving routine things, like housework, my attention.

On occasion, I sense God working and realize He is moving me toward His purposes, in some fashion. But things like that are not clear or understood in the now. It’s as much of a hope that He is working as a realization that He is, in fact, doing something here.

I have to trust in Him. I have to surrender to His sovereignty. For one thing, I have no choice. Also, in an effort to bring Him glory with my life, I must praise Him in this suffering. He is good. He has extended a mighty hand of grace. I don’t deserve what He has given. Yet, He offers anyway…

Those who know your name trust in you because you have not abandoned those who seek you, LORD.

Psalm 9:10

God, you haven’t left me. You have been with me through this entire valley, and long before. The fact that troubles come does not take away from your perfect will and power. My suffering does not minimize your strength, it provides opportunity to demonstrate your glory.

This song, “Even If”, was played at Jana’s funeral. We watched Mercy Me perform it, live, in 2017. At the time, it was not particularly meaningful to me, but now it is a fixture in my heart. Even if you don’t, my hope is You alone.

They say sometimes you win some
Sometimes you lose some
And right now, right now I’m losing bad
I’ve stood on this stage night after night
Reminding the broken it’ll be alright
But right now, oh right now I just can’t
It’s easy to sing
When there’s nothing to bring me down
But what will I say
When I’m held to the flame
Like I am right now

I know You’re able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone

They say it only takes a little faith
To move a mountain
Well good thing
A little faith is all I have, right now
But God, when You choose
To leave mountains unmovable
Oh give me the strength to be able to sing
It is well with my soul

I know the sorrow, and I know the hurt
Would all go away if You’d just say the word
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone

You’ve been faithful, You’ve been good
All of my days
Jesus, I will cling to You
Come what may
‘Cause I know You’re able
I know You can
I know the sorrow, I know the hurt
Would all go away if You’d just say the word
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone

It is well with my soul
It is well, it is well with my soul

“Even If” Mercy Me Link to the song on Spotify.

One Comment Add yours

  1. jennbrown77 says:

    Whew… that’s a good and hard song to listen to. I am glad God never leaves us and that truly he is still good, even if.

    Liked by 1 person

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